


Walk It Off

by thesoldierwithredstar



Series: Requiem [1]
Category: Hawkeye (Comics)
Genre: Black Mercy, F/M, marvel dc crossover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-31
Updated: 2016-03-31
Packaged: 2018-05-30 00:47:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6401086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesoldierwithredstar/pseuds/thesoldierwithredstar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is written for a "what if" on tumblr zarabithia posted: "my dc peeps who are also familiar with marvel;</p><p>Myriadnakama is in my messages, asking me about “What if Hawkeye Squared got infected with Black Mercy.” " </p><p>Some of you will ask, "What is Black Mercy?"<br/>-Black Mercy is a plant that creates a dream of a person's perfect life by tapping into the pleasure centers of a person's brain.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Walk It Off

**Author's Note:**

> lots of thanks to [@theholyfandoms](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Theholyfandoms/pseuds/Theholyfandoms) on here, [@ineedapuppyandsomevodka](http://ineedapuppyandsomevodka.tumblr.com) on tumblr for editing this piece.

"Where is my birthday boy?" 

"Daddy!" the kid grinned and jumped into Clint's arms, hugging him like a koala bear. 

"I missed you buddy" Clint said, hugging him back.

"Missed you, too,” He said, and looked around the apartment. “Where is Katie?" 

"She'll be back. Sometimes three days can feel like a whole year." He grinned and looked at Bobbi who set the little bag she was holding on the island in the kitchen, as she walked in.

"Tell me about it" Bobbi smiled, "Your place looks nice. I’m guessing someone helped?" 

"What do you think?" Clint snorted looking at his apartment which looked ready for a birthday party. No way he could have done all the decorating by himself, not in a day at the least. He owed Barney and Simone for that, and Kate, of course, who had left to go get the birthday cake. "Hunter's not coming?" 

"He's parking the car. Is grandma coming?" Nick asked excitedly, bouncing in Clint’s arms. He was seven years old and heavy, and very lucky to have a dad that was strong enough to hold him.

"I don’t know, do you wanna call them and ask?" Clint grabbed his phone, his cheeks already hurt from smiling. He dialed his mother's number, hoping she would be kind enough to actually answer it this time. He set Nick down, letting him run to his dog, Lucky, who was as eager as Nick was to get a hug in. The dog loved the boy more than he loved Clint.

There was a knock at the door, and Bobbi moved to answer it. "Must be Hunter” She said, moving aside to make room for the giant bag that he was carrying. It had all of their gifts for Nick, then he hid it in the hallway closet, since Nick, who was distracted by the dog, would never check there.

Soon the others joined them as well, the team, Steve, Sam, Bucky (who looked less in serial killer mode than the other times -Clint could swear he smiled at some point, damn, if he could be quick enough to take a photo of it), Natasha, Barney and Simone with their kids, Bruce... The whole squad was there. Then Nick's friends started joining them, too, and Clint started to think the apartment was the wrong choice for a group this size. Maybe he should've listened to Tony and had it in the tower? Nah, everyone seemed okay with the situation, so he stopped worrying about it. 

He opened the door for their latest guests, and he swore Nick could be faster than Pietro when he saw his grandma.

"Are we late?" Kate asked sneaking into the kitchen while Nick was distracted, and put the cake in the fridge for it to get cold. "We were stuck in good ole New York traffic. Barely moved an inch in a half an hour. It was awful.”

"Did you forget that your foot was on the break?" Clint teased with a smirk on his face and kissed her temple. It was a bit difficult to hear even his own voice over the noise in the house, so he focused on her lips... But was able to hear her quite easily. Huh...

"That's not how you drive a car, let me teach you sometime" she bickered with a grin, patting his chest. "I think everyone's here? Yeah? Let’s not make Nick wait any longer. You know how antsy he gets."

Clint nodded smiling, and kissed her, then gathered everyone in the living room so they could put the cake on the coffee table and serve it from there. He gave a tight hug to his mom and Bill, her husband, then Kate's mom who made it there just before Nick blew the candles. 

"What does this make you now? Three?" Tony teased while the others were busy with making sure everyone got a slice. 

"No! Seven!" 

"Seven? So you must be very old now, huh? Like a grandpa?" 

"Yeah! But not as old as you!" Nick laughed, and stood behind his clever joke proudly, as Steve tried to hide his laugh behind his fist. 

"The kid won this round, Tony" He acclaimed the obvious by patting him on the back. 

"Shut up, he doesn’t even know how to write fifty six" 

"Yeah, I know! You put six to five's right. Is that your age?" Nick raised a brow, and some people might have said he could have been Kate's kid with that smug expression on his face. 

"Now, if you be quiet, you can get Iron Man to put on a special show for you, alright?" Tony whispered leaning towards the kid, and patted his back, then grinned a smug grin when the kid agreed easily. "I've never met anyone who has said no to that offer" 

"You know you have to keep your promise, or I'm gonna write your age on every billboard in the city. Uh-huh, yeah, I've heard."  Kate grinned, then cut him off when Tony opened his mouth to reply. "Did you know you and Clint's mom are at the same--" 

"Alright, alright! Just—Don’t ever talk about it" Tony grumbled, rolling his eyes. 

"Aw, you're such a gentleman, here's your cake" she handed him a plate, then helped Clint take the rest of the cake and other unnecessary things to the kitchen. 

They sat down around Nick for a while, and everyone gave their presents to the kid, who got tired from smiling so brightly. He showed everything to his friends, and a few minutes later, the apartment looked like a daycare. The toys and all of his presents were scattered everywhere while a bunch of kids were trying to decide which one was cooler than the other to play before they had to leave them to Nick. 

"He's got enough things to play with for the next five years." Clint snorted, watching him happily. He felt as if he had some kind of privilege in this life by having a happy family and job, while what they did was really dangerous to have a family, or even someone loved. But this was good, this was perfect; Kate was right here, smiling and bickering with Barney, as always. His mom was smiling and watching her grandson freak out with the new things he got. The team was here, definitely not minding the lack of seats in the apartment. They had let the elders to take the couch, and those three looked happy about it. He was happy, standing in a full of apartment of his big family. No one was humiliating him, no one was complaining about anything, there were just laughter and quality conversations...   
It was so good... 

Maybe too good? 

No, this was good. 

Really? 

_Stop thinking, you're thinking, stop this._

_Why would you worry in a day like this? This is normal; this is what we do on every October 12th. This is our ritual, well, except the place, this year is my turn to have the party in my place... Everyone's here, everyone's happy, too happy. Too much, this is too much—_

Clint felt his heart pace up, and he just stared around like a frozen rabbit under a sudden light. Was this right? He had been feeling a lump in his chest on every October 12th, even when he woke up-- when did he wake up by the way? Had he even gotten out of bed today? He was forcing himself to remember, but was only to remember his stupid dream where Kate and him were on a plant mission _(?)_ , yeah it was a stupid dream. 

"Clint?" She rested her hand on his arm gently, her eyes filled with worry. The whole team was looking at him, he thought they were worried at the beginning, but he'd recognize suspicion anywhere. 

"I'm-- Kate, uh..." _Alright, alright. What to do first? Take a deep breath. Everything's going to be okay..._

 "I think Tony needs some ice. Help me get that?" he grabbed his glass and dragged Kate to the kitchen.

"Oh my God, Clint, that was the worst excuse I've ever seen" Kate rolled her eyes, but then looked at him again. "What's going on?" 

"Do you... Have you ever had that feeling where you’re not sure what is going on is real?" He asked quietly after a moment. He hoped she'd say yes, or that he was being ridiculous. He probably was. 

"What? Uh... Yeah? Do you feel like that?" She asked, and smiled when he nodded slowly. "Stop worrying. It's your son's birthday, enjoy it, okay? This is so real and you're here with me. This is you being ridiculous." 

Clint hadn't felt relieved this much in his life, ever. He let out a long breath he hadn't realized he had been holding, and smiled with a nod. "Yeah, you're right. You're right... " 

"Of course I am. Fill my glass, too? I'll use the bathroom. Remember, no alcohol in mine." 

"Yeah--” _wait, what?_ "Why?" 

"If you want a weird shaped baby, you can put it in, but I wouldn't suggest that" she smiled and went upstairs. 

"Yeah, right, right. Baby..." Clint nodded, but didn't feel like he accepted the situation. She was pregnant? Another baby? When did that happen? Was he okay with that? Was she? This early? 

_Oh my God, I'm losing my mind. Not on his birthday, shut this thing off!_

The questions were still running through his mind non-stop. Although it felt like they were the right ones, he didn't want to hear them. He wanted them to stop, desperately shutting his eyes close and pressing on his hands on his ears. 

He took a deep breath... Counted to ten, and voila, there was only silence. 

Even when he took his hands off his ears. 

Smiling, he opened his eyes, and saw Kate. But she wasn't calm and happy, she looked panicked and exhausted. Was he dreaming again? Was he still sleeping before getting up and decorating the apartment for Nick? 

"Stop yelling" he mumbled, and felt a cracked rib when he sat up. He could still hear her, but with only one ear. He felt the missing hearing aid when he touched his ear. So that was why. 

"Are you okay?" Kate asked softly. The old factory looked like a battlefield, there were cut plants on everywhere, but two were close to him, and Kate, maybe? 

"I'm... I need to..."Clint mumbled, he was still trying to wake up, but as the seconds passed, he felt like it wasn't going to happen. 

"It wasn't real, Clint. Whatever you saw, it wasn’t real. This is real, okay? Let's go home." Kate kept talking in front of him, and held his face in between her hands to look into his eyes. "It wasn't real..." 

Clint blinked, it was real, it _felt_ real. It was the most realistic thing he'd felt. No, he was just dreaming, he needed to wake up and-- "Nick will be here-- I gotta..." he mumbled getting up, and the pain in his ankle was the most realistic thing he felt, but he stepped on it anyway. His mind was busy and telling-- yelling himself to wake up, get his ass out of the bed and go get the cake, be ready for Nick and everyone. Nick was coming... In a few hours... 

He looked out of the window of the abandoned factory, and it was... snowing. He could tell that while the white pieces were glowing under the yellow street lamp that was enlightening the dark street in front of the factory. It should have been hot, not snowing. 

Was Kate right? Hadn’t they agreed to be honest to each other? 

"Clint, you're worrying me" He heard Kate say it in the background, and just wished she could give him a few minutes to figure this out. 

"What... What day is this?" he asked after a while, his voice sounded hoarse. 

"It's January fifth" Kate, bless her soul, cooed like a mother talking to her child, and was watching him carefully, as Clint looked back into her eyes in desperation. She was right then, huh? The urge to wake up was disappearing as the time passed, because this was real. He was awake. There was no birthday party, no cake, no Nick... He'd never been born. His own mom was dead, let alone being married to someone rich to make her happy. Kate was right there, at least, but they had issues, same with the team... Nothing could be that flawless, that perfect. Especially if you were Clint Barton. 

Idiot, you can’t bring a dead baby back to life. You can't have what you never deserved... 

"It was the plants... They give hallucinations." Kate interrupted again, as he dropped his gaze. 

Clint nodded, and attempted to walk, leaning on his bruised ankle to feel the pain, so he could stay in the moment. "I'm fine" he whispered when Kate tried to help him. "You?"

Although she wasn’t, she nodded, had figured whatever he saw was more frustrating than hers, so she thought he needed some time alone. She watched him limp through the plants and rusty tables. 

Clint got in the car with her, and let her drive it. He knew she was still watching him, but didn’t care. He needed to prove it, and phones would know the exact date, right? So he turned it on, praying he was still dreaming, and he had to be home as soon as possible because he'd prefer that nervousness to this one. Clint waited for his phone to open, and swallowed as he saw the date. 

  _January 5 th._

**Author's Note:**

> i hope i made you cry, thanks for reading! [find me on tumblr](http://captainkittysparrow.tumblr.com)


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